OS-related humor

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PurpleGurl
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by PurpleGurl »

So we now have SAC (Special Administrative Console). Will we ever get a Special Heap Information Terminal?

mrugiero
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by mrugiero »

PurpleGurl wrote:So we now have SAC (Special Administrative Console). Will we ever get a Special Heap Information Terminal?
I believe gigaherz would like that program. It might help him finishing the Partial Implementation of SubSystems.

rembrandt
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by rembrandt »

I'm still waiting for the Primary Unified Kernel Executive to come out. All I've heard so far is Reverse Engineered Transaction Cache Hypervisors.

PurpleGurl
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by PurpleGurl »

rembrandt wrote:I'm still waiting for the Primary Unified Kernel Executive to come out. All I've heard so far is Reverse Engineered Transaction Cache Hypervisors.
LOL! Some of the things we bring up... I'd expect that the be written by Belle Lemia, Ivanna Upchuck, or maybe Anna Rexia. Just hope they don't have to "toss" the code.

The_French_Rat
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by The_French_Rat »

I was thinking about writing a Central Heap and Unified Console Kernel....

I'm just seeing what ideas you throw up.
Just think of ReactOS as the XP beta, Whistler.

Webunny
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by Webunny »

While browsing the Net, I stumbled on this one about ROS (on slashdot):

Re:BSOD as a replacement feature? (4, Funny)
rjune (123157) | about a year ago | (#45400995)

If they're getting BSOD's aren't they about 90% complete?


I thought it pretty funny. :P

PurpleGurl
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by PurpleGurl »

This is a classic Windows joke:

With the recent problems being encountered by Windows users all across the country, people are begin to ask themselves if windows is a virus. In response to the high demand for an answer to that question a study was done and concluded the following.

1. Viruses replicate quickly.
Windows does this.

2. Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so.
Windows does this.

3. Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk.
Windows does this.

4. Viruses are usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems.
Windows does that too.

5. Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware.
Same with Windows, yet again.

Maybe Windows really is a virus.

Nope! There is a difference!

Viruses are well supported by their authors, are frequently updated, and tend to become more sophisticated as they mature. So there! Windows is not a virus.

Aeneas
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by Aeneas »

I really like: "Who is General Failure and why is he reading my disk?"

PurpleGurl
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by PurpleGurl »

While ROS uses Wine, the OS is not addicted to anything. I know this because it regularly uses patches.

Unlike most people who would evict a freeloader, ROS keeps giving its freeloader fixes.

With all the spam about kitchens of late, will ROS have everything installed when it is complete, even the kitchen sink? Still, I guess that is still better than the spammers turning General Discussion into Viagra and other Genital Discussion.

If our project name were something that could be abbreviated VA, what would we call our MSGINA module?

PurpleGurl
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by PurpleGurl »

Okay, I am likely breaking 2 rules here, but this thread is long overdue for a bump.

Years ago, I was playing around with my PC, and wanting to make it a girl computer. So I changed the vendor strings to where the vendor was "Purple Girl Systems" and the model as a "PMS Special." Hey, it already locked up several days out of a month. Instead of the BSOD, I made it have a Magenta Screen of Death. And I made the background purple and all, with pink and so on.

Oh, I used to play around with sector editors too. I made it to where the command interpreter was named, commode.com, and even changed the error string as well - "Bad or missing commode.com." I guess if I wanted to be more creative, I could have changed those 7 letters to a common, compound vulgarity, but I didn't think of that then.

And while it is not particularly humor, I did use the hex editing for more utilitarian purposes, like fixing typos in dialogs in DOS programs. Two of the most common string types I found were null terminated and string descriptor. While I could not create longer strings in finished programs, I could make them shorter. Null terminated was easy, since you could put a null character after the shorter string. The string descriptors were not hard either, assuming you could find them. They were often the 4 bytes before the string, and the first part was the length (and the other part was the offset, which you'd generally leave alone). So I'd reduce the length in the cases where I patched in a shorter string.

minecraftchest1
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by minecraftchest1 »

Here's one.
I've heard of the Linux and NT kernels. If I pop them, will I get Linux or NT corn?
My name is MinecraftChest1.
I am a Windows and Linux user.
I have broken reactos once.
That's my resume.

Kevin Castro
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by Kevin Castro »

Two men—XP and Vista—walk in to a pub. Vista says to XP, "You grab a table, sweetie. I'll get the drinks."
Vista then approaches the bar and says to the server, "I'll have two gin-and-tonics, please."
The server responds, "There's three types of gin—oxygen, hydrogen, and nitrogen. Perhaps you'd like two beers."
Vista retires to the table and relates this exchange to XP.
XP storms up to the bar and says to the server, "I'll have two gin-and-tonics, please."
The server responds, "As I told your friend, there's three types of gin—oxygen, hydrogen, and nitrogen."
XP replies, "Well, there's three types of turd—custard, mustard, and you, you big shit. Run, Vista, run!"
0.4.13: Gigabyte GA-F2A68HM-DS2 [mobo], AMD A4 7300 [APU], TP-Link TG-3269 PCI network card (XP Beta driver online), Corsair (DRAMless) 120GB SSD

MartinWill1989
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by MartinWill1989 »

tomleem wrote:
Mon Dec 24, 2012 6:03 am
I read of a tech support getting a call about the floppy disk would no longer be readable after he put a labeled it. It turned out that the 'label' was him putting the floppy disk into a typewriter to label it. :lol:
This is one of the stupidest things I've ever read. But it seems to me that there is no limit to human stupidity

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gonzoMD
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Re: OS-related humor

Post by gonzoMD »

I just read a story about a scene group that got busted in the 80s. The cops took every media they found but punched the floppies to put them into a folder. Good old German bureaucracy.

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